Hello there, I’m glad you decided to read this. If you’re anything like me, you’ve had your fill of “easy weight loss” gimmicks. As if there were such a thing. I’ve found, as a general rule, the things in life which are cheap and easy are unfulfilling and quickly lose their luster.
When it comes to losing weight and gaining it back, I’m an expert. I’ve lost and gained 30 pounds more times than I can count since I was 17 years old. Seventeen seems like an excellent place to start giving you some history on my weight loss/gain journey.
I grew up in what may be your typical American home. We ate fast food, drank soda/sweet tea (a true Southern tradition), and were never without sweets aplenty. Really when I look back and see how most of my friends and we ate at home, it is little wonder we have an epidemic of obesity in our Nation.
Somewhere around the late 90’s early 2000’s I stumbled upon something which I thought was the answer, Hydroxycut. Back then, it contained a little ingredient called Ephedrine, which was essentially a legal version of the drug Speed. Let’s say I’m thankful I didn’t have a heart attack back then.
I was in the best shape of my life (physically), leading into 2003 when I joined the Air Force. My goal (or what I thought I wanted), after all, was to become Pararescue; therefore, I trained rigorously. I enlisted at 172 pounds, was probably around 180ish when I arrived at Basic Training, and several months later, after Tech School, I was about 230. I lived off tuna and water for one month and lost 30 pounds, but it was short-lived because I didn’t realize what the root cause of my weight issues really were.
I could recount numerous other gains and losses, but you get the idea. By this point, we either have a connection, or we don’t. Sure, maybe your weight issues haven’t been quite as extreme, or perhaps they’ve been worse, but as you can tell, I’ve been right there with you.
I think it was around 2009 by the time I finally got back down to the 170s. I accomplished that by watching my caloric intake and exercise. Wait, wait, don’t leave. I know what you’re thinking. Oh no, he’s going to push calorie counting. Don’t worry; I’m not going there.
I told you upfront in the title; I have four keys for successful weight loss. I didn’t mention; however, these same four keys are essential for weight loss maintenance, but I assure you they are crucial.
Before we address these keys, allow me to ask you a question. What is the difference between you and others who have found success with some diet/exercise program? We all know those people who tried the same diet we did, but unlike us, it worked for them. They may have been the person pushing “their diet” methods hard, but it didn’t work for you, or maybe the results came, but keeping it off proved the challenge. Why?
Before we answer, allow me to say, I think any diet has merit if it’s safe and works for you. However, the diet isn’t the issue. The issue is, firstly, why did you gain weight in the first place? The answer to that varies greatly depending on the reader. You may be an “emotional eater,” or “refuse to go without a burger and fries,” you could “simply lack discipline,” or “hate exercise and can’t stand salad.” Regardless of what w might say is our issue, it comes down to a common problem we all have. Ready for it? Self Control. There it is, I said it.
It’s not that most diets can’t do what they advertise, but they can’t change you personally. Sure, they may help you, drop XX pounds in a week, but what then? A diet is meant to be temporary. It’s a means to an end and not the end itself. Diets are only the “end itself” for people who have discipline in their eating. They gained weight due to some other situation. Maybe the family got pregnant and gained weight. Maybe an injury caused some weight gain. Regardless of what happened, some people can use a diet to get to their desired result, and then they go back to their usual way of eating. Why? Because they had self-control before the weight gain. All they needed was a little boost to get them back to their desired weight. That’s not the case for you and me, is it?
Before we can truly get down to business and discuss my “4 keys,” I need your help. There is something which you must do before these “keys” can help you. Ready for it? This may be hard, but I know you can do it. Have you heard it said, “you have to acknowledge you have a problem before you can change?” Well, that’s not only for those who wrestle with Alcohol, Tobacco, or Drugs, nope, it’s for you and me as well. So, why not go somewhere private and just let it out? Just say it aloud. Ready, I’ll say it with you on Three. One, Two, Three. “I have a problem.” It’s more than words. What you just did has power behind it. It’s not the 10 pounds, is it? There’s something else, a deeper issue. Don’t worry; you’re not alone.
I promise not to identify a problem and not further address it. The problem is complicated, but the answer is simple. We’ve already discussed it. We lack Self Control not just in the way we eat but in our life in general. Whether it’s lack of controlling our tongue, emotions, eating, relationships, or anything else, the root stems from something in us that’s lacking.
Remember above, when we mentioned our “end.” For us, there has to be more than a diet. What’s our “end”? One reason people can’t maintain the weight is they believe the “diet” is the “end” and don’t realize it’s only a “means to the end.” It can get the 10 pounds off, but something else has to keep it off.
As promised up front, here are my “My 4 Keys to Weight Loss (and keeping it off).
- Commitment
- Self Control (Discipline) I’m sorry for using the “D-Word,” but I can’t help myself.
- Determination
- Persistence
Okay, they’re out there. Now, if you’re still with me, I’m glad. I know those are four intimidating words, but I promise they are crucial to achieving our goals.
Why commitment? We must commit to more than a 6-week diet. We must have a long term goal in mind and be determined to achieve it. Committing to losing 10 pounds won’t work anymore. It’s a dead-end, and deep down, we know it. It’s not the 10 pounds we need to lose, but it’s what we need to gain, and that’s Self Control.
Why Self Control? Because with it, you’ll feel accomplished and empowered, but without it, you’ll keep riding the diet/weight gain merry-go-round. Self Control is not something we can buy, and if it were, it wouldn’t be cheap. Self Control will cost you, but it’s worth it’s cost.
Why Determination? Because overeating, laziness, stress, abuse of sweets, too many softs drinks, pizza, fast food, and other causes of a weight gain aren’t going anywhere. Every day you’ll face those giants, and each day you defeat them, you’re more empowered. No one wants to talk about the losses, but I’ve had my share of both victory and loss. Neither has made me stronger than the other. I’ve learned from both, and I’ve determined to achieve the end goal.
What is my end goal? It’s certainly not losing 10 pounds. Nothing wrong with a 10-pound weight loss, but that’s a temporary goal and not really where I should be aiming. If I address the root of my issues, then the 10 pounds will be part of that journey. Honestly, I’m not willing to spend my hard-earned, Commitment, Self Control, Determination, and Perseverance for something cheap. I won’t dig into my bank account and make a withdrawal against something which was hard-earned.
The four keys will cost you something, and the more you invest in each of them, the more prosperous you’ll become. My end goal is to be fully in control of myself in every possible way.
Lastly but certainly not least Persistence. Although Determination is a synonym for Persistence, I prefer to separate them here. Determination will get me moving in the right direction with a head of steam, but persistence will keep me going when I’m uncertain whether I will succeed or not. Just because we determine to accomplish a temporary goal doesn’t mean it’ll happen. When self-doubt tries to creep in, I need to persist. Will I achieve my interim goal? It’s uncertain, but persistence is entirely within my control. If my end goal is to become a better, stronger version of myself, then at the end of my journey, if I win or lose ( in terms of my temporary goal) I still win because I gained something internally valuable which I can withdraw next time I’m facing something difficult.