“Mawwwage. Mawwage is what brings us to today. Marriage, that blessed arrangement. That dream, within a dream!” – The Impressive Clergyman (The Princess Bride)
What do you think when you hear the word marriage? Commitment? Faithfulness? Forever? Perhaps the topic doesn’t evoke such cheerful thoughts for you. Maybe you feel more like, marriage is: Constraining? Temporary? Difficult?
Regardless of our experiences, I’d venture to say that God’s view of marriage is radically different than ours in most instances. Speaking of, let’s have a look at what he has to say about it.
In Genesis—my favorite book, have I mentioned that before?—it says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” (Gen. 2:24)
Here’s a little tip that my friend and Pastor from our church in England shared with me. “When you see the word therefore in scripture, you need to ask, what is that there for?”
In this instance, the preceding verse is sufficient for context.
Genesis 2:23 Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.”
The Apostle Paul in his letter to the Ephesians quotes this passage.
Ephesians 5:31
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother
and hold fast to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.”
But he doesn’t stop there. He goes on to say something very interesting about marriage.
v32 “This mystery is profound,
and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”
Over the next couple of weeks, we will be looking at this “mystery” and how the relationship between the Lord Jesus and his church resembles a marriage between a man and a woman.
At one point, in this nation, when a young man was pursuing a young woman, it was called courting. Sure the term is now considered a bit old-fashioned, but still, I think it has a certain ring to it.
When I was courting my wife, I told her that my feelings toward her had changed, and unless God or she said no, I was determined to have her. Now some lovers have to wait weeks, months, and even years in some cases to have the one they love but thankfully I didn’t have to wait nearly that long. In fact, after I told her how I felt, I only had to wait the three longest days of my life to get this response:
The moment I picked up my phone and discovered the note, I became the happiest man alive.
I wonder if that’s how Jesus feels every time he extends the invitation for someone to become part of his family. Much like I had to express my feelings for Lisa, the Lord expresses his desire to have a relationship with us when, by his Spirit, he draws us.
Consider this passage:
John 6:44
No one can come to me unless
the Father who sent me draws him.
And I will raise him up on the last day.
Those early days of our relationship were truly something unforgettable. Like most newlyweds, I probably drove people crazy talking about her so much and it wasn’t any different when Jesus called me to himself. I wanted to tell everyone about Jesus and what he had done for me. After all, his love transformed my life.
Sadly, Lisa and I only got to enjoy a few months of marriage before I was shipped off to spend a year in Honduras. Thankfully, neither of us were alone. I knew that the Lord had directed my footsteps and he would be with my bride and me during our separation. Although being apart weighed heavily upon each of us, our love remained strong. Lisa kept a countdown on her phone and we anticipated the day when we’d be together again.
You know in some ways that must be how Jesus feels right now. He must be longing to have his bride with him. The Bible says something unique about what Jesus is doing or has already done while in his Father’s house.
John 14:2
In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?
v3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.
Although we won’t be discussing it during this teaching, there is an amazing parallel between the Jewish wedding, the events surrounding it, and the marriage of Christ and the church. Matthew 25:1-13 is a good place to start your study on the topic although some external resources will be necessary for a more complete understanding.
I’ll end this week’s teaching with this thought. As I mentioned above, I probably drove people crazy talking about Lisa. I was so excited to have her as my bride and wanted everyone to know about the love we shared.
Now, after nearly twelve years of marriage, we’re a bit more familiar with each other and although we don’t have those newlywed butterflies, our love hasn’t diminished, although it has changed.
You know, when Christ first saved me in 2009, I was crazy in love with him and wanted everyone to know about him. Similar to my relationship with Lisa, I’m sure I was driving people crazy by talking about Jesus all the time. Still, how could I keep silent after everything he did for me?
Now, after a little over 14 years of serving the Lord, I don’t have those newlywed butterflies. Like my marriage, the feelings have changed. Lisa and I have talked many times about how love changes in our marriage and in our relationship with Jesus. I have trouble putting it into words, but thankfully a musician from the 80’s named Keith Green wrote a song that summed it up perfectly for me.
Grace by Which I’m Saved[Verse 1]
Lord, the feelings are not the same
I guess I’m older
I guess I’ve changed
And how I wish it had been explained
That as you’re growing
You must remember
[Chorus]
That nothing lasts
Except the grace of God
By which I stand in Jesus
I know that I would surely fall away
Except for grace
By which I am saved
[Verse 2]
Lord, I remember that special way
I vowed to serve You
When it was brand new
But like Peter, I can’t even watch and pray
One hour with You
And I bet I could deny You, too
[Chorus 2]
And nothing lasts
Except the grace of God
By which I stand in Jesus
I’m sure that my whole life would waste away
Except for grace
By which I’m saved